Road to Kunoichi
by Shiore Yashagoro
Summary: Sasuke is a slacker with the worst grades in his graduating class, achieving ninja status only on account of his exit exam scores. He is almost as skilled as his canon counterpart, but is disillusioned with ninja life and prefers to spend his ninja life enjoying time. He buys most of his weed from Shino.


Disclaimer: _I do not own nor claim to own-_

Greetings, friends and flamers! (Not that I'm expecting any, but whatever.)

This will be my first original venture into the infamous "turn-Naruto-into-a-girl" territory that I broached (barely) in my adopted fanfic "Bewitched", in which I refer to femNaruto as "Naruto" but with feminine pronouns. This is because that story's version of Naruko is initially a boy. I was originally gonna stick with that texture and just call femNaruto "Naruto" because why the hell not? That is, after all, not only the spiral fishcake that he's named after but also the name of the hero taken out of Jiraiya's 'Tale of a Gutsy Ninja'.

The thing about the fan name "Naruko" that I didn't know was that it's actually a grammatical clause in Japanese wherein you add "-ko" or "-mi" to a name (meaning "child" and "beauty", respectively). Using "-ko" at the end of a name makes it grammatically feminine. So there's a reason for these things, which is sort of comforting.

The premise of my story is an alternate reality where things are basically the same but with a twist: It's all based on early Part I estimations and impression mixed haphazard with elements of later canon I saw fit to combine! And of course the things from other fanfics I've read over the years that bear repeating.

Of course, I only made the story more like I expected it would be originally, mixed with elements of things I have noticed aren't common enough in this sort of story so I threw them in there. I want to do something sort of "new" without venturing too far into insanity. Good luck to me so far as that's concerned.

I made minor changes to the story, stuff people used to fill in with their imaginations before the story got too complicated or oversimplified. I suspect Masashi Kishimoto kinda makes up story developments as he goes along, which is fine, but I want to, again, do a story or two (or more) taking place in an amalgamation of first impressions and whatever else I thought looked cool.

Examples of things I changed might be some characters' ages. I toyed with making Itachi older and Orochimaru younger. I screwed with history as a whole the way Madara has a way of retro-actively doing. Thus we come to this little "gem" of mine.

And, without further adieu, I give you my long-suffering plot bunny incarnate!

-By the way, just thought I'd mention in here too, just sort of as an aside, I totally fucked with the team assignments- for what else but love?

Hope you enjoy.

The premise for this one was a long time in coming. Basically, I loosely adapted the Shippuden movie "Road To Ninja" with the idea that half the characters would essentially remain the same as they are, and combined elements I liked from previous fan fiction (making this a Recursive fanfic), and taking tips from Less Wrong and 50caliberchaos's style of re-imagining a world almost completely and making everything stronger, smarter, deadlier, and all-around more scary. We'll see how well I do with any of that, lol.

So here's the working idea: Naruto has parents, and they're still running the village (unlike the movie) and our mileage might vary on how illusory the world as a whole may turn out to be. I combined a lot of different little things I wanted to do in separate stories to make things exciting. Oh, and Naruto's a girl. That's the main thing I wanted to do with this, instead of doing Evil!Naruto, which was the other thing I toyed with doing. I would ordinarily avoid fan nicknames like "Naruko", but I looked it up and this is actually grammatically correct for a feminized version of a boy's name (not that Naruto is anything but a food item in the real world, and barely more in the Naru-verse, courtesy Jiraiya's obscure novel). Thus, I have written Naruto as "Naruko". Just go with it; I know it's weird.

For those of you who've seen the new movie, or heard about it: Have fun guessing what I changed or kept the same or pulled out of my ass.

 **And I definitely don't own Naruto!**

- _Le sigh-_

"Hey Sasuke," the kunoichi appeared in a swirl of leaves, perched on the corner of his apartment balcony's guardrail. It looked very cool and ninja-like, he had to admit.

Sasuke, Last of the Pride of Uchiha clan, acknowledged her presence with a mere nod.

"One of these days you're going to teach me," he informed her, apropos of nothing.

Naruko stared blankly at him for a moment before realizing what h'd meant and she laughing uncontrollably. Undeniably it was a musical noise, to Sasuke it distinctly thought it sounded like a bunch of barking howls and yips, like secretly the blond was some sort of mystical woodland animal, perhaps one with the power to henge. He considered it briefly, and concluded it would probably explain much.

"What the hell are you laughing at, Namikaze?"

She immediately struggled to stop laughing.

"It's just… you never ask me for _anything._ I mean, you could get _anyone_ to teach you that move. Why not beg me to show you my dad's Flying Thunder God or the freakin' Rasengan? What's so special about a leaf-style body flicker!"

It was true, Sasuke had his pick of any personal instructor or Academy tutor if ever he cared to. This wasn't even the first time he'd suggested Naruko show him that _one_ jutsu. Honestly, he still would every now and then, purely for his amusement. He felt his lips tug at the corners into a smile.

"Did you secure the goods?" Sasuke pressed archly.

The girl scoffed theatrically, pushing past Sasuke as she entered into his bedroom through the sliding glass door and sauntered off purposefully towards the kitchen.

He followed, finding her at his fridge sifting through condiments and various leftovers for a suitable snack food. Secretively, he appreciated the silhouette of her form while it was bent over from the hips like that. Her pleated orange-black tennis skirt completely upturned, treating him to a view of her off-white panties and the taut cheeks that lay beneath them, leading to a set of long, bare thighs and calves. Seriously, it was as though, overnight, she'd gotten legs that came up to _'here', and_ it wasn't that Sasuke was even a lech per se, and he most certainly didn't have a thing for his childhood friend. But by their age it was becoming hard _not_ to notice. No matter what kind of person she was underneath, a radiantly feminine (if not childish) exterior presided.

She usually wore a similarly schemed black-and-orange track jacket that pretty much covered up everything above the waist, and was probably a size or two big for her. Today, it was a black t-shirt with an Uzumaki-whirl print on the front, with a smaller one on the upper back. It clung flatteringly to her chiseled torso and showed off her arms.

"Cheers," she said, nudging one of two soda cans she'd fished up from the bottom shelf into Sasuke's open hand, then moving to lean against one of his countertops. Gingerly, she snapped the lid to her drink open, inhaling the cherry-scented carbon fizz and taking a leisurely sip. Sasuke gazed down at his unopened soda for a long moment before cracking it open.

"So how's the family?" He asked after a period of companionable silence expired. The kunoichi sniffled.

"They're fine, though I guess they're gonna be a lot busier after the Academy graduations come through." She paused momentarily, chewing on her lip in a way Sasuke had seen her do before when she was feeling troubled. "Sure you're really ready for this, Sasuke-chan?"

That stopped him in his tracks. What did she mean, 'was he ready'?

"Of course I am, you ditz. Why wouldn't I be ready? This is something I've been training for my whole life!"

"You can say that, but I wasn't the one scoring dead-last this year, Uchiha. Or any other year since floral arrangement or tea ceremony." She pointed at him. "You've flunked _four_ years in a row."

"I can't be expected to do everything myself all the time at once," he defended. "Besides, I'm only gaming the system so that they'll have to place us onto the same team."

"You know, my mom's the Hokage," the girl pointed out. "Your mother and mine were old friends. Failing on purpose to compensate for my inherent awesomeness is kind of redundant."

"Isn't that like cheating?" He smirked.

"What part of 'ninja' haven't you been paying attention to? We're not even the only Genin squad Dad's going to fudge for next week. Tell me that you're at least mastered the Basic Three, Sasuke."

"I activated my Sharingan at the age of eight, Naruko. I'd mastered my family jutsu even before that. I've copied and learned outrageously powerful ninjutsu after one look! I don't need to practice hard at anything to be good. If you're so worried, we can go outside in a minute and you can show me all the big, scary grown-up jutsu you think I should know already."

"This isn't a joke, Sasuke," she said seriously. "If you fail, we really won't get to be teammates. You'll have to repeat the Academy another year. That would literally cut my heart in two. I meant it."

"And this is me, not joking," he set aside the drink and stood to his full height.

"Fine," she grinned nastily, chucking her drained soda can deftly into the waste bin which, Sasuke noted with a touch of amusement, lay hidden in her blind spot.

He followed her out of the front door and down two flights of stairs. They were technically on his property in the Uchiha district, but the old, original buildings were all condemned and either repurposed or torn down following the destruction of the Clan by his own request to the Hokage. Now he had neighbors, and even a 'landlord' whose job was primarily taking responsibility for whatever broke down in Sasuke's apartment complex. There were shops and marketplaces, utility stations, laundry mats, and even civilian schoolhouses. The best part? All of them paid _him_ rent to live there. Sasuke wouldn't have to work a single day in his life unless wanted. He could date all of the most pretty girls in the Fire Nation and have fun, socialize, go to parties, become addicted to the best and most expensive drugs available- whatever he wanted. Sasuke wanted to be a ninja. He went to school and he busted his ass when nobody was looking to train his body and mind to be effective in life-or-death situations. He wanted to protect his friends and his neighbors, his village, maybe even become a legendary hero someday. He even had a role model in that respect. Iconic posters of the legendary Sannin in question littered all of his walls, alongside those of his deceased family, all of them framed. As far as he was concerned, they were all heroes to the village who went down protecting it. As they marched briskly through the streets he saw that he was drawing looks from people here and there. Maybe they thought he was up to something more interesting than he really was. Well, whatever. Why hadn't they taken to hopping over the rooftops anyway?

Not five minutes later they were standing in the nearest sanctioned training ground, which had been cleverly designated '108' by the Shinobi council. It was probably the single largest training site this end of Konohagakure no Sato. Sasuke couldn't readily recall everything the engineers tore down whilst they were building it, but he knew for sure they'd leveled the Naka shrine at some point because he'd been there to make sure the little bomb shelter his clan had hidden under it was properly sealed and filled out. Once they were significantly out of range from civilian bystanders, Naruko turned to face him.

"Alright, Dead-last. Come at me!"

"Hnn? I thought you were just showing me the basics."

"Damn straight, I am. You're getting a crash course, Uchiha." She smiled, cracking her knuckles in preparation. "Just the basics."

"Fine," Sasuke lowered into a tiger stance and launched into a slightly overextended taijutsu assault. Naruko grinned like a maniac but didn't move as he charged at her. His first strike hit her in the face with a sickening crack, when white smoke from one of her bombs erupted, and he realized a second too late that his fist had met with a hunk of wood from the area.

Substitution technique, obviously.

As the smoke cleared, Naruko had vanished into hiding and in her place stood more than a dozen clones, all giving him the same adorable look. If they were shadow clones, he might have strangled one 'till it burst. He heard laughter from somewhere, but the source was difficult to discern. Naruko was either moving around the field rapidly or employing the ninja art of ventriloquism. There were trees and shrubs, some large boulders, and even a few training posts which the girl might have hidden behind, but it was also well within her powers to teleport all over the place if it screwed with his head.

She said it would only be basics, so he cooled his jets a little and started moulding chakra. As he flashed through the zodiac seals, Sasuke inhaled sharply and drew his chakra towards the back of his throat. Then he pursed his lips to convey a devastating gout of fire that killed all the plant life and caused Naruko's clones to waver like mirages and break. Out of the dissipating flames, the real Naruko appeared sauntering over towards her opponent, unconcerned with countless glowing embers or by the boulders weeping molten rock.

"Your sharingan's not even turned on!" She complained.

"What makes you think I need it?" Sasuke countered.

She formed the ram seal at the halfway point on the stroll towards Sasuke, and another billow of white engulfed her to conceal her jutsu. Out of the smoke emerged a vision from his night terrors. Geared in full Anbu garb just as he had been the last time, his brother Itachi grasped past his shoulder to unsheathe a ninjato mounted there, directing the sword in Sasuke's direction. With a wave of adrenaline flooding his system, instincts immediately took hold.

The mirror-wheel of his Sharingan surged alive, engorging his eyes with blood as all of his senses sharpened. He could make out a tangible aura surrounding his foe and Itachi's movements all slowed down momentarily. Twelve of Itachi phased into existence around them, all moving the same: all wielding identical murder weapons. With his eyes, however woefully incomplete, he could pick out the originator instantly.

He launched a spread of Shuriken on guided wires, sending them into a long parabolic arc through the clones and behind his opponent. Tugging on the wires expertly, he drew taut the metal lines and pinned Naruko's back against one of the training posts not too far in the background. There was a slightly warm, giddy feeling as he sank four kunai into the soft ground, each one tied off at the end. The last one he held within his hand, as he closed the distance between them.

"Yield," he commanded coolly, looming above her.

A very un-Itachi-like grin spread across her face, before another log appeared from nowhere with a suddenly 'poof'. Heh, a log tied to a bigger log with ninja wire. Sasuke turned his head to regard the blond sitting up in a tree rather daintily. She gave a great whoop of approval.

"You looked like you were really gonna let me 'feel' the power of Uchiha," she quipped.

He glowered back. That'd been a little low, even for her.

"Has anybody ever mentioned you look seriously cute when you do that?"

"Now that I've copied your basic tree or whatever," his eyebrow twitched comically, "I want to have a real match."

"The Basic _Three_ , Sasuke, are your ticket out of the academy," she admonished. "Honestly, I can't imagine how you got anywhere without learning one. I didn't know it was even _possible_ to go through ninja school without even accidentally becoming proficient."

She disappeared from the tree branch and reappeared several paces behind Sasuke, looking out. For a moment, they remained still as statuary. The only sounds were of leaves tousled by the breeze or noises from birds tittering.

"I haven't forgotten, you know," Sasuke intoned darkly, "what you owe me."

"Oh?" She scoffed.

"Yes, so tell me," Sasuke said, reaching for his shrunken pouch.

Her body tensed. Was he reaching for a weapon? She was beginning to slightly regret some of the things she'd used against him. As a slacker versus the girl who was top of her class, she might still need to treat the Uchiha as a credible threat. Her eyes darted in the direction of his movement, even though she couldn't see with her back turned. If he attacked her now, she'd be prepared.

"Not sure I know what you mean," she breathed coolly.

"Of course you do; I gave you money last week. Now I expect you to give me," Sasuke whipped out his glass pipe and a favorite Shippo lighter, stamped of course with the Uchiha crest, "my ounce of weed."

-oOoOo-

"I will now announce the squad assignments for the graduating class of new Genin so pay very close attention!"

The teacher cleared his throat before proceeding in a gesture one might suspect that he'd rehearsed. The graduates paid rapt attention to their long-time, long-suffering sensei, Iruka Umino as he read off the names of everybody present in the order they were assigned into their predetermined squads. Everybody present was quite palpably excited… well, nearly everyone.

"This is taking way too long. I kinda wish he'd get this over with so we can just go home," Shikamaru blandly confided in his seat-mate, the insatiable, unabashedly voracious Akimichi, Chouji.

"Yup."

Chouji munched on chips and pocky sticks he'd packed from home whiling away the time until they'd have to meet their new sensei. Extra calories also helped keep his body fit for got _rigorous_ exercise. Well, that was the idea at least.

"Team Three will consist of the following members…" Iruka meandered on.

"That would impossible. You may ask why, but it is because we will need to interact with whoever our new instructors happen to be soon after this, and traditionally squads share their lunchtime with each other in order to forge bonds with one another and facilitate the necessary teamwork all Shinobi of the Leaf believe in deeply."

Shino, who so happened sitting directly in front of the two friends, took it upon himself explain the situation, as 'succinctly' as an Aburame can.

"Additionally, our aforementioned hour of lunch recess takes place prior to our compulsory engagement with the aforementioned sensei, so regardless of where or what one chooses to go or do in the time before then, it is not allowed for you or any other new Shinobi here to return home. I hope you found this most enlightening, fellow Ninja of the Leaf."

Shikamaru groaned and threw his head back in exasperation.

" _ **God**_ , I hope we don't get paired with you,"

If the Akimichi had a thing to say, he kept it wisely to himself. As a matter of fact, not even a skilled interrogator could have told if Chouji even noticed they had almost-had a conversation.

"And for Team _Six_ …" Iruka dutifully rattled on. He had resolved today not to notice whether any of them, in fact, goofing off. After all, they were Shinobi of the Leaf now, and in the eyes of the Law they were legal responsible adults… whatever that meant. Besides, another part of him reasoned, today was special.

"Soo, Sakura-chan…" a certain blond addressed Sakura, covertly of course, "Whaduya say we go grab a bite to eat together once they're done here? It'd be fun, ya know? Sort of like a _date!_ "

The aforementioned Sakura did not suppress a shiver. Epic reputation aside, that one definitely weirded her out sometimes. It was totally not the first time she'd been propositioned this way, even if the blond was admittedly easy on the eyes. In a way it actually reminded her of Ino… but that was something else entirely!

"…And Sasuke Uchiha!"

There was a stunned silence across the classroom momentarily. The aforesaid Uchiha scowled determinedly, but neither blond nor pinkette understood it immediately. Iruka had gone on, so Sakura Haruno leaned over the desk to the boy beneath her to ask what'd happened, since she knew from experience what would come of asking Sasuke directly.

The boy who she had tapped on the shoulder and looked inquiringly at him. He must have understood her question, as grinned right back at her, gesturing madly between her two seat-mates on either side of the girl and somewhere across the room before he scribbled something on a sheet of scrap paper he had pulled from somewhere.

Finishing, he folded up the message before handing it up to her.

Sakura unfurled the note, blinking with surprise as she abruptly heard her name called out followed up by Ino's not a moment later. Squinting slightly, she made out the poor handwriting.

' _Sensei put that Namikaze on with Sasuke and the Hyuuga!'_ She read that again, making sure she got it right.

"Heh, well I'll be damned," Naruko's voice erupted next to her, kind of breathy and half-whispered, right against her ear. Sakura felt a flushed against her cheeks and knew she must be blushing. Gaah! Had the blond _no_ sense of personal boundaries?

"…And finally, on Team Ten we'll have…"

Sadly no one heard or paid much attention to the last three men in the group. Shikamaru could be heard banging his head against the wooden polish of his desk for exactly five seconds. They were five of the dullest seconds in his young life, because he knew. And damn it, now he'd be stuck with it. For the rest of his days as a Genin, and then maybe after. But at least he'd have his foxhole buddy Chouji… even though it wouldn't quite make up for… Tch! _What a drag!_

"Don't worry, Sakura-chan!" Naruko piped in a sing-song voice. "We can still be thick as thieves in all of our down time! It really isn't that bad," Though she tried her best to cheer the pinkette up, it was meaningless.

"Ya see?" Her ever-helpful "friend" Ino posited, "we'll both be on the same team! With Kiba! Isn't that wonderful?"

Sakura made a weird cocking noise with her mouth as she pointed the end of her index finger directly into the topography of her forehead.

"Bang! BANG-BANG!"

Sakura dropped her head onto the hard desktop, with a resounding 'thud', drooling dripping out by the side of her mouth just slightly.

"Was it something I said?" Ino tilted her head quizzically.

The other blond girl snickered.

-oOoOo-

The Hokage sat, tapping her desk, with a heavy sigh the likes of which she seemed to be breathing a lot more lately.

"Remind me now," Mebuki drawled, "why I need to send my dear beautiful child on a perilous mission with her newly-minted team outside Konohagakure? This is," she took another look over the three ratty twelve-year-olds and Kakashi, trying to find a tactful way to finish that sentence, "most irregular."

"What, you think we can't handle ourselves!?" Naruko struck a defiant pose, hand cocked on her hip.

"I just want to get this straight," the Fourth continued, holding up a hand in what she hoped resembled a placating gesture, "that having completed no missions, whatsoever, you would like to serve as honor guards for the Firelord at a special ceremony preempting the bicentennial Comet Obon in the Capitol? Are you serious?"

"I think Sasuke and Hinata are ready for it. You've put me through training from hell since before I could talk, and you made sure I'm monstrously powerful. If you think Kakashi needs some extra training, I'm sure his old master would be more than happy to oblige him with some practice drills and stuff to brush off the rust of age off his ass."

Hinata snickered while Sasuke tried his best to look like he wasn't really there. For his part, Kakashi looked visibly embarrassed in front of his students.

"That won't be necessary, I'm sure," Mebuki sighed, "but do try to show a little respect towards your ranking superiors. We do live in a military village, Naruko."

"Does that mean you're gonna give us a real mission? If you stick me with babysitting or picking up dog shit , I swear I'll get Mom to hurt you!"

"Please don't threaten the Hokage, dear adorable little minion. She's kind of my boss, after all." Kakashi tried desperately to diffuse the situation.

"'Kind of'?" Hinata smirked, obviously enjoying herself.

"You know there's a good reason for these D-Ranks, Honey," Mebuki went on, unfazed by the apparent threat to her precious bodily fluids. "We're only supposed to give you kids a chance at gaining experience before we send you out on more dangerous C-ranks. Defending the Daimyo is at least A-Rank because he's already such a high-profile target."

"It's not like he doesn't already have his own elite shinobi guards permanently watching him. Even Asuma-sensei was a member once," the girl said reasonably, "we'd only be providing extra ground support."

"A job for more highly-trained shinobi than yourselves at least," the Hokage forged on, obviously losing patience.

"We're ready!"

"You're not!"

"You suck!"

"Eat me!"

Hours later, the eponymous Team Kakashi was walking solemnly towards their first Genin mission: digging up potatoes by the edge of town. Naruko looked seething pissed, and Sasuke was still trying to act invisible. Kakashi had been whistling awkwardly on their way out of the Academy building after that disastrous bidding session with the village leader, and Hinata had in fact never stopped smiling like a lunatic the entire time. What was up with that, anyway?

"I'm really sorry, Sasuke," Naruko ground out from between her teeth. "Mothers can be such unreasonable monsters."

Wordlessly, the Uchiha handed a wad of cash over to his blue-haired teammate and then shoved his hands back in his pockets. It had been a bet, after all.

"You should be nicer to the Hokage, Naruko. She looked kind of sorry after you handed it to her like that."

"Shut up, Hinata!" The blond barked.

"You didn't have to do it, you know." Sasuke looked strangely pensive. "I wouldn't ask you to put strain on your family on account of some stupid bet we made before we graduated."

"Don't worry about it," Naruko offhanded, "Mom's used to this sort of thing from me. Or if she's not, she should be!"

"I thought you and your mother had a healthy, respectful sort of a mother-daughter dynamic," Hinata chipped in, thoughtfully.

"If you call making me eat shit every time we have to train privately, I suppose maybe it's vaguely out-of-character," the blond snorted.

"Hey, we're here," Kakashi intoned mirthfully.

Sakura and her team were painting fences nearby on the same farmland they had been assigned Potato duty. Kurenai looked awfully serene from her perch on the shady porch nearby, with her feet kicked up and a glass of hot tea or maybe sake dangled limply from her hand. Kakashi left his team to do their work and approached Kurenai.

"You look well-adapted," he remarked cheerfully.

The kunoichi tilted her straw sunhat and regarded Kakashi with a look bordering between frustration and amusement.

"Mind if I join you?" There was a poof of smoke and the Copy-ninja crashed in the freshly-summoned easy chair and grabbed an Icha Icha novel off the nightstand next to him, which definitely had not been there a moment ago.

Kurenai smothered the scoff on her lips with a chuckle and tilted her hat back over her eye line, obscuring the sun.

-oOoOo-

Punk Hinata rounded the underground corner on her way to make Naruko a 'special training visit' with and ran straight into Uzumaki Memna!

"It is the Illusion World of the Short-shorts!" She began. But the sly Menma already had her pinned against a wall and had her pleading to get out. He snaked two of his fingers under the lip of her shorts and tugged. Worn smooth with practice, he pulled the shorts free of her hips and pressed her harder against the wall.

"What big teeth you have…" Menma breathed.

From inside, Rin pushed against Menma's psyche, jokingly driving his consciousness into Hinata's predicament. It was just as dark as the way Kikyo in the play of the Warring States Era breathed against her reincarnation's whole dream-center breathingly high. The voice tugged his murk straight through the unquiet of the turned tables into Hinata's dream-like aura. With no memories of the Namikaze girl she wanted to see, and only the mission in mind, the soon-to-be S-Class villain moved in on his prize.

The cloaked forces of the Konoha Thirteen knelt, ready to hop at the Anbu's Root Commander, Haruno Mebuki, for what they didn't know would be the last time. Hinata for her part looked exhausted, but promisingly not a hair on her head stood out of place. Also present to the left and to the right of Sakura's mother were Inuzuka Tsume and Yuuhi Kurenai. Behind Mebuki loomed in the shadow the red-blood herself, none other than Uzumaki Habanero, Kushina the Yoko's yang-jinchuuriki. Tsume smiled wildly and bent low, her hands clasped behind her like a child, rocking gently back-and-forth with excitement.

"We have a special surprise for you kids today," she began. "It is a secret technique— of haters!"

The youki of the fox unraveled invisibly from Kushina's gods-eye natal seal and the goddess Kaguya coalesced into being like the shinigami, levitating directly above and behind Mebuki Haruno, the stigmata of the Rinnegan glowingly visible in her palms and on her forehead, her flowing robes concealing said surprise.

"Stand Center!" Mebuki barked hardenedly.

The assembled Konoha Twelve recited the passwords for Anbu Root's underground from behind their masks.

"What big teeth you have!"

"What big teeth you have!"

"What big teeth you have!"

"Perfect!" Mebuki nodded sagely.

Kaguya's silhouette floated into further visibility, a vicious grin adorning her beyond-perfect facial features.

"It is the Illusion World of the Asura-Kushina!" She sang, lifting her robe like a curtain. Tall and well-built, otherworldly even, the Progenitor of all Chakra swam forward and a phallus, such as they had never seen, finally showed itself. It was joined to the hood of the vulva rather than as separate package, like a hermaphrodite rather than a ladyboy. The secret technique indeed.

"My beautiful children…" She began. "I have such wonderful things… to show you!"

-oOoOo-

Uzumaki Kushina sat at home, with her family Minato and Naruto, enjoying a meal of freshly-prepared steamed rice and spotted fish, with herbs and bellflowers. There were asparagus and tomatoes, for added nutrition. She could be fully in this moment, her family and her there.

Alone, she stared at the stigmata of the Rinnegan on her palms, or where it would be rather, if her awakening mode were triggered. In her mind's eye the head, heart and life lines on her hands were accompanied by the last living parts of Mikoto Uchiha, one of her childhood friends besides Mebuki. The eyes vanished like smoke from her palms along with the Asura mode's snapping lids.

It had taken a raid of Hashirama's living sanctified remains, some nervous soft-tissue from the Senju Clan Head's heart muscles, before the onyx eyes of her late friend transformed into the samsara interference pattern of the Rinnegan. There was just a blank space in her palms now, no evidence of her final pact with Mikoto to avenge the Uchiha. Just a normal set of hands for cooking dinner and keeping her practice at shuriken accuracy and precision from rusting over.

The billow of smoke from her wrist rockets scarcely dissipating from her first experimental practice with the awakened path of the Asura. She had unlocked the five elements alongside the six paths at the same time as she combined the heart tissue of Hashirama with the bequeathed eyes of Mikoto Uchiha, but their pact was for the Asura family alone. So the Asura path stayed with her mind.


End file.
